Jan 5, 2005

Back to School (Spring 2005)

I’m not quit ready for school yet. Yesterday we did not do much (1st day), but even then I was not interested in the very minimum that we did do. For the past two days, I’ve only been taking notes and observing what people around me are doing and saying (mostly teachers). I’m finding faults in almost everything. I was going to write about my observations but I don’t remember them anymore.

Am I losing myself? I did not use to forget stuff, what’s happening now? Could it be because I do not interact with people anymore? Or because I do not step outside the house? Or because friends… ???

"Brains Shutting Down" --schernekau, jan04

Schernekau mentioned yesterday that if people don’t do something then something happens and somehow their brain does something and something, something, something. I cannot remember what the hell she said, I can’t even state it in my own words! But, I do remember that I listened to her very carefully and agreed with her point.

The same is happening with me. My mind is not as sharp as it used to be. At least so it seems. Hmmm… the conclusion is, I got to start utilizing this thing that’s inside my head.

"Illegal Immigrants" --economics with dees, jan05

I don’t like Dees’s face (dunno why). I can’t think of a reason, but I hate him. It could be possible that I forgot, but who knows. Anyways, today was the first day of Economics. Half way through the lecture the issue of illegal immigrants taking up jobs came up. He repeated the same words he used to recite in Government.

“Do you know how many illegals are estimated to be in the US?”
He went to the board and wrote “10.”
Somebody asked, “10?”
Dees laughed and said, “No! Not 10!! 10 million!!!”
Everybody laughed and he started reciting again, “Nobody wants to do the work they do. If somehow all of these 10 million people were to disappear, we would not be able to fill all the jobs that they leave behind. Who will build our houses? Who will cut the pizza at CiCi’s? If today, they are earning $7/hour in the United States and think that they are better off here. What do you think they might have left behind? Nothing!!”

I listened to him carefully and cameup with only one word – “Everything!”

"How The Blogger Feels" --geetali sharma urf kishu, jan05

I don’t know about illegals. Maybe they really don’t want to go back to their countries, maybe they don’t care about all that they did leave behind, and maybe the sight of money has taken away their senses. But… ME, MYSELF, and I… I love my India!

We are very well-off here. Got everything! Air conditioning in summers, heating in winters, well paying jobs to buy and own everything – big screen TV, microwave, oven, mixer-&-grinder, stereo, desktops, laptops, cars – excellent public schools with free education, teachers who don’t give a zero for being absent or not doing the hw. Every materialistic thing possible! But, where’s Diwali? Where’s Holi? Where are the celebrations for Eid and Mahavir Jayanti? Where are the roads where kids play and get off whenever a car approaches? Neighbors you actually know and who look after your kids? Public transport? Markets on every nukkad? Places you can walk to? Friends that are like you and understand you? Life you can live???

I don’t care about materials, I care about feelings. I don’t care about my wants, I care about my needs. and… I NEED MY INDIA!

"The Nursing Home Deal" --schernekau, jan05

Today in class Schernekau said, “It is estimated that within the next 50year all of the oil resources of the world will run out. I don’t need to be worrying about it because I’ll be in a nursing home by then, but you do!” I did not worry about running out off all the oil. What caught my attention was her saying the stuff about living in a nursing home.

First, I thought is that what I’m going to do with my parents? The answer came out to be, “NO!” Why would I? How can I? Then, I thought is this was my kids are going to do with me? This time the answer was, “Who knows.” Waise bhi, it’s a long way from here.

It’s not like such things don’t happen in India, of course they do. I don’t know of any, but that’s a different story. Schernekau’s dialogue amazed me. I mean, she said it so smoothly, with no hesitations whatsoever. I wonder if I’d ever be able to say it like her.

“Parents Vs. Kids” --i pondered over this after thinking about the above mentioned

Anuj bhai completed his undergrad in April/May 2004. His plan was to work for an year, earn a good amount of money and then go to grad school. Nana suggested to start his master’s right away and not worry about the money ’cause Ritu Masi and MausaJi have enough.

I always wonder… why parents expect their kids to expect financial assistance from them. Why are parents always willing to do so much when probably a nursing home is their final destination in this mortal world. Anuj and Neeraj bhai would not do this (of course!), but I’m talking in general.

Personally, I want to be independent. I want to pay for my own education. Not because I’m ignorant, not because I don’t love my parents, not coz I want to break away from my family, not coz I’m “becoming an American,” but because then the education will mean more to me. I’ll try to make the best of my hard earned money. Somehow I feel that a lot of the desi parents don’t understand this.

Another thing I don’t understand is that what’s the big deal with not living at home. Can’t they understand that home won’t do any good. I’m sorry, but I believe in my own personal experiences and I’m not going to go by what others felt. Life’s too short. I’ve been living on this earth for almost 18 years and I still don’t know who the hell I am. How am I to discover myself if I’m protected under the “desi-parent law.” I love to fly and I will not tolerate being imprisoned!

"Kill The Cell Phone" --shirley, jan05

Vaishnavi’s cell phone went off in the beginning of class. We were just talking about random stuff. After hearing the ring everybody started talking extremely loudly. Shirley, on the other hand, with the cute smile on this chubby little face, walked up to the cupboard, got the toolbox and pulled out a hammer.

1 comment:

  1. hmm....such a long post..so many things to reply...where should i start? and how to keep this short?
    ok. 1. homesickness is very normal. the adjustment from india to georgia must be huge. so...hopefully you'll get a vacation or something back to india soon. and atlanta is a pretty big city, so i am sure there is a sizeable indian population, doesn't your temple host Divali and Holi celebrations?
    2. just speaking as someone in university and knowing ppl who have graduated from their B.Sci etc and started looking for jobs. I know that it isn't nearly that easy getting a job coming straight out of undergrad. so, it was prob a much better decision for "Anuj" to do his masters one time.
    3. indian ppl and old people's homes...whoo.. there is a tricky one. traditional values say of course not. but...times are changing and ppl are changing. i think now it comes down to the family involved. i cant see myself doing it , you can't see yourself doing it, but there are still indian ppl in old ppl homes. can't really judge cause you never know the circumstances.
    well that was my 2 cents. keep well. shivee.